The Twins Are Coming: What Would Sarah Palin Say?

Goose Goslin got his nickname
from his rather large nose.

Perhaps as Ben Revere dashed home with the winning run for the Minnesota Twins this afternoon, he yelled out a warning to the Cleveland Indians. OK, probably not. That's just the way I imagine Sarah Palin would report it.

In reality, Revere, on a mission to score, issued no warning to the enemy. But seeing a player with such a distinguished last name triggered memories of baseball name games of my youth.

Harry Caray was famous for fooling with players' names, often pronouncing them backward, for no apparent reason. Bill Melton of the Chicago White Sox thus became Llib Motlem.

Other name games took a little more thought. For instance, creating a list of players whose names fit their positions. How could Rollie Fingers, Bill Hands or Three-Finger Brown been anything other than pitchers?

Another list would include players whose names had a common theme, animals perhaps. For that list you might find Kevin Bass, Steve Trout, Dizzy Trout, Rabbit Maranvile, Rob Deer, Moose Skowron, Catfish Hunter, Jimmie Foxx, Nellie Fox, Tim Salmon, Ducky Medwick and the two Gooses (Geese?), Goslin and Gossage.

Then there are the players who perhaps collected nicknames based on their eccentricities. Dizzy Dean, Goofy (Lefty) Gomez, and Daffy Dean (although his nickname seem to have been hung on him to match his brother's sobriquet).

Maybe because baseball offers more time for reflection (between innings and, nowadays, between pitches as batters fiddle with their batting gloves), but no other sports seems to generate so much chatter like this. Or maybe it's all the beer that fans (and Harry Caray) consume that leads to all this nonsense.

The Sounds of Baseball

As a change of pace, I am writing about one of the best parts of baseball: the announcers. Maybe it's because no other game translates as well to words or that the pace of the is perfect for analysis and chatter, but there's something soothing about hearing your favorite broadcasters.

Some of the best announcers shine brighter when the game is dull. My favorite in those situations is Bob Uecker. After 40 years, Uecker has developed into a fine play-by-play man, but early in his career he was strictly there for color. He knew the game, but listeners couldn't wait for his next great line. Whether it was tales of his rookie signing bonus (his Dad couldn't afford to pay the Braves much) or his method of catching a knuckler (wait till it stops rolling and pick it up), Uecker was entertaining, even if the Brewers weren't (which was more often than not).

Harry Caray was another original. He had almost the opposite career of Uecker. By all accounts, he was a fine announcer when he started out with the Cardinals. Sports Illustrated (flip to page 82 of the link) once did a story on him complete with a photo of him wearing only polka-dot boxers while announcing a game on a sweltering St. Louis day. By the time he was with the White Sox, it sounded like his famous carousing was beginning to affect his announcing. He frequently would say players' names backwards (Bill Melton would be Llib Notlem), or he would say things like "This game reminds me of a recipe for chicken salad," leaving the listener to figure out what he meant.

It helped that his broadcast partner, Jimmy Piersall, could be equally obtuse ("Ted Kluszewski must weigh 300 pounds without arms") Piersall was the subject of the movie "Fear Strikes Out."' Later, after a strong first few years with the Cubs, Caray jumped the shark. By the end he was a caricature of himself, even when doing his signature rendition of "Take Me Out to the Ballgame."

Of the present-day announcers, I like the Mets color team of Keith Hernandez and Ron Darling. They both offer sharp analysis and have a goofy sense of humor that keeps them from sounding like know-it-alls. And Hernandez, of all the announcers I have heard, seems most like someone you'd want to have a beer with. His cultural references include mentions of TV and music of the 1960s and 1970s. He really does seem like the guy on "Seinfeld."

Other announcers I enjoyed were Lou Boudreau and Vince Lloyd with the Cubs, Ernie Harwell of the Tigers and Merle Harmon, who was Uecker's early partner.

Who are your favorite announcers? Let's get a discussion going.